Tarvendit Rutdusspop is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, duplicitous bee.

Tarvendit Rutdusspop created a down quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tarvendit Rutdusspop, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Tarvendit Rutdusspop, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Tarvendit Rutdusspop's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Tarvendit Rutdusspop's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Porpoises are not to be trusted.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Never look at stars.