Haddiss is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, duplicitous porpoise.

Haddiss created a Higgs boson two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Haddiss, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Haddiss, she will come to you in dreams.

Haddiss' most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Haddiss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill shrews.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.