Armrigsig is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, flying raven.

Armrigsig created snails eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Armrigsig, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Armrigsig, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Armrigsig's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Armrigsig's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Armrigsig eight times a day.

2. Armrigsig loves pigs, so they must be honoured.

3. Always look after injured seals.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Always pray immersed in water.