Gatkapnurt is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, self-confident raven.

Gatkapnurt created snails four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gatkapnurt, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Gatkapnurt, she will turn you into a blue tit.

Gatkapnurt's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Gatkapnurt's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat pineapples.

2. Do not dye your hair mauve.

3. Never look at nebulae.

4. Feed all hungry hamsters.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.