Fobshavominlegyarpbafcud is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, wise armadillo.

Fobshavominlegyarpbafcud created a top quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fobshavominlegyarpbafcud, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Fobshavominlegyarpbafcud, he will turn you into a hamster.

Fobshavominlegyarpbafcud's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Fobshavominlegyarpbafcud's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Never feed apples to moths while wearing pink corsets.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate monkeys.

5. Never eat grapes.