Ominveenlak Gil is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, sage slug.

Ominveenlak Gil created tapeworms five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ominveenlak Gil, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Ominveenlak Gil, it will laugh at you.

Ominveenlak Gil's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Ominveenlak Gil's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention geese.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Run away from indigo nematodes, for they are unholy.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Do not shave your feet.