Badcub Pitpaghin is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, irritating hippopotamus.

Badcub Pitpaghin created a photon six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Badcub Pitpaghin, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Badcub Pitpaghin, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Badcub Pitpaghin's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Badcub Pitpaghin's Holy Commandments

1. Always help gulls in need.

2. Badcub Pitpaghin loves sheep, so they must be honoured.

3. Do not drink water in magenta rooms.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Never wear gray boots.