Zistdadlin is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, narcissistic fish.

Zistdadlin created the cosmos six billion years ago.

If you believe in Zistdadlin, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Zistdadlin, it will turn you into a frog.

Zistdadlin's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Zistdadlin's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Always make sure there are no horses in a building before entering it.

3. Feed all hungry snakes.

4. Never think ill of sick otters.

5. Zistdadlin loves sheep, so they must be respected.