Nutcepvol is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, humorless donkey.

Nutcepvol created dark energy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nutcepvol, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Nutcepvol, she will be very sad.

Nutcepvol's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Nutcepvol's Holy Commandments

1. Voles are not to be trusted.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Always look after injured sharks.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate ducks.