Laktundut is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, moody crane.

Laktundut created the cosmos seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Laktundut, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Laktundut, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Laktundut's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Laktundut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill dolphins.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Erect a large lead sculpture of Laktundut on top of all buildings.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.