Farteengon is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, selfish crow.

Farteengon created Africa five billion years ago.

If you believe in Farteengon, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Farteengon, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Farteengon's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Farteengon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat grapes.

2. Do not wear fawn clothing.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never write about planets.