Wipdidcub is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, merciful cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Wipdidcub created the Small Magellanic Cloud nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wipdidcub, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Wipdidcub, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Wipdidcub's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Wipdidcub's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Ants are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Never mention nematodes.