Gabrilltonkmip is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, tiresome hyena.

Gabrilltonkmip created the Sun eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gabrilltonkmip, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Gabrilltonkmip, it will ignore you.

Gabrilltonkmip's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Gabrilltonkmip's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Do not speak about cherries.

3. Never hurt cats.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

5. Do not eat nuts.