Karmifbap is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, unthoughtful dolphin.

Karmifbap created everything that exists four million years ago.

If you believe in Karmifbap, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Karmifbap, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Karmifbap's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Karmifbap's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Karmifbap.

2. Retreat if three porpoises approach from the east.

3. Hide if nine rats approach from the south.

4. Never look at planets.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.