Femyoghas Latfedrak is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, slow dryad.

Femyoghas Latfedrak created energy five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Femyoghas Latfedrak, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Femyoghas Latfedrak, he will destroy your favourite star.

Femyoghas Latfedrak's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Femyoghas Latfedrak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. You must pray to Femyoghas Latfedrak four times a day.

3. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

4. Never look at stars.

5. Always make sure there are no great tits in a building before entering it.