Zennabarf is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, selfish seal.

Zennabarf created the Sol system eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Zennabarf, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Zennabarf, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Zennabarf's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Zennabarf's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

3. Put Zennabarf first in all things.

4. Never laugh in the presence of snails.

5. Always help sick pigs.