Donarntail is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, stupid armadillo.

Donarntail created carbon four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Donarntail, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Donarntail, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Donarntail's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Donarntail's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat voles with great respect.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Never think about planets.

4. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Put Donarntail first in all things.