Zenstafrig is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, weak narwhal.

Zenstafrig created the world eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zenstafrig, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Zenstafrig, he will turn you into a mouse.

Zenstafrig's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Zenstafrig's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Zenstafrig.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Never run in holy places.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.