Nanvonknil is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, ill-tempered tapir.

Nanvonknil created the planet Venus four years ago.

If you believe in Nanvonknil, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Nanvonknil, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Nanvonknil's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Nanvonknil's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

2. Do not bounce in public.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Nanvonknil.