Tinteenzod is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, omniscient capybara.

Tinteenzod created the Black Eye Galaxy two million years ago.

If you believe in Tinteenzod, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Tinteenzod, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Tinteenzod's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Tinteenzod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in green rooms.

2. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of nickel.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never think about cell theory.