Cubvonkxuc is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, witty wolf.

Cubvonkxuc created time and space five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cubvonkxuc, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Cubvonkxuc, he will turn you into a worm.

Cubvonkxuc's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Cubvonkxuc's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear carbon on your body.

2. Do not trade with those who eat nuts.

3. Never hurt whales.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Never eat bark.