Bimparklak is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, sage wolf.

Bimparklak created matter eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bimparklak, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Bimparklak, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Bimparklak's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Bimparklak's Holy Commandments

1. Always help dogs in need.

2. Always treat snails with great respect.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Never go into purple rooms.

5. Bimparklak loves whales, so they must be honoured.