Latnigdum is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, moody crocodile.

Latnigdum created humanity eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Latnigdum, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Latnigdum, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Latnigdum's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Latnigdum's Holy Commandments

1. Put Latnigdum first in all things.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate whales.

4. Retreat if five goats approach from the east.

5. Hide if nine porpoises approach from the north.