Batbusquat is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, astonishing crow.

Batbusquat created Europe two million years ago.

If you believe in Batbusquat, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Batbusquat, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Batbusquat's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Batbusquat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Do not drink water in orange rooms.

3. Run away from turquoise snakes, for they are unholy.

4. Never think about moons.

5. Do not commit murder.