Nelbittonmapbottifdot is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, flying hamster.

Nelbittonmapbottifdot created a quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nelbittonmapbottifdot, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Nelbittonmapbottifdot, he will turn you into a slug.

Nelbittonmapbottifdot's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Nelbittonmapbottifdot's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about comets.

2. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

3. Do not trade with those who eat bananas.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Never laugh in holy places.