Pasafpas is a god.

She takes the form of a small, awe-inspiring hyena.

Pasafpas created time and space four million years ago.

If you believe in Pasafpas, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Pasafpas, she will attempt to scare you with hail.

Pasafpas' most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Pasafpas' Holy Commandments

1. Run away if seven badgers approach from the east.

2. Pasafpas loves dolphins, so they must be honoured.

3. Do not wear purple clothing.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never eat bark.