Arfjigtab is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, deceitful goose.

Arfjigtab created the Sunflower Galaxy seven million years ago.

If you believe in Arfjigtab, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Arfjigtab, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Arfjigtab's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Arfjigtab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate aardvarks.

3. Never eat turnips.

4. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

5. Never write about stars.