Happomsid Flowrapweg is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, sage lion.

Happomsid Flowrapweg created oxygen nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Happomsid Flowrapweg, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Happomsid Flowrapweg, he will turn you into a worm.

Happomsid Flowrapweg's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Happomsid Flowrapweg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Put Happomsid Flowrapweg first in all things.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate ducks.