Libjengess is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, grumpy lion.

Libjengess created a bottom quark six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Libjengess, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Libjengess, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Libjengess' most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Libjengess' Holy Commandments

1. Never wear white boots.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. You must never eat aubergines.

5. Do not drink alcohol.