Mobflablag is a god.

She takes the form of a large, duplicitous tortoise.

Mobflablag created the Large Magellanic Cloud five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mobflablag, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Mobflablag, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Mobflablag's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Mobflablag's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from purple hamsters, for they are unholy.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Always obey Mobflablag's priests.