Pigfarlap is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, clever shrew.

Pigfarlap created Asia seven million years ago.

If you believe in Pigfarlap, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Pigfarlap, it will throw large rocks at you.

Pigfarlap's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Pigfarlap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Pigfarlap's name in vain.

2. Never look at galaxies.

3. Always help cats in need.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Always stare at clouds.