Funbapflap is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, all-knowing mole.

Funbapflap created the Cigar Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Funbapflap, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Funbapflap, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Funbapflap's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Funbapflap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Ants are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Never laugh near moths.

5. Do not listen to music.