Dogarpjip is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, annoying deer.

Dogarpjip created oxygen two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dogarpjip, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Dogarpjip, it will turn you into a blue tit.

Dogarpjip's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Dogarpjip's Holy Commandments

1. Always help horses in need.

2. Never talk about gravity.

3. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Always make sure there are no voles in a building before entering it.