Kemvenyatteenarmlarp Ratyogfom is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, stupid octopus.

Kemvenyatteenarmlarp Ratyogfom created everything that exists six million years ago.

If you believe in Kemvenyatteenarmlarp Ratyogfom, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Kemvenyatteenarmlarp Ratyogfom, she will turn you into a duck.

Kemvenyatteenarmlarp Ratyogfom's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Kemvenyatteenarmlarp Ratyogfom's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

2. Never hurt birds.

3. Do not drink water in black rooms.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.