Pitmegdid is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, moody walrus.

Pitmegdid created an up quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pitmegdid, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Pitmegdid, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Pitmegdid's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Pitmegdid's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Always make sure there are no horses in a building before entering it.

3. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Never think ill of sick manatees.