Zagzigstan is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, conceited octopus.

Zagzigstan created the planet Jupiter three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zagzigstan, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Zagzigstan, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Zagzigstan's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Zagzigstan's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if five tapirs approach from the north.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate whales.

5. Never write about gravity.