Viltanjab is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, selfish shrew.

Viltanjab created the solar system nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Viltanjab, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Viltanjab, it will think nothing of it.

Viltanjab's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Viltanjab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear titanium on your body.

2. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

3. Feed all hungry grasshopers.

4. Always obey Viltanjab's priests.

5. Do not cook food in pots.