Fetgigtik Tunlabkad is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, staggering penguin.

Fetgigtik Tunlabkad created the Andromeda Galaxy nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fetgigtik Tunlabkad, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Fetgigtik Tunlabkad, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Fetgigtik Tunlabkad's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Fetgigtik Tunlabkad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill doves.

2. Never feed lemons to sheep while wearing indigo rings.

3. Never talk about comets.

4. Never go into red rooms.

5. Do not eat pineapples.