Nigqueegpon Bodhinflan is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, self-assured dryad.

Nigqueegpon Bodhinflan created the Sombrero Galaxy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nigqueegpon Bodhinflan, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Nigqueegpon Bodhinflan, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Nigqueegpon Bodhinflan's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Nigqueegpon Bodhinflan's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Hide from white great tits for they are unholy.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Run away from brown gulls, for they are unholy.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Nigqueegpon Bodhinflan.