Tag is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, bad-tempered lion.

Tag created a top quark five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tag, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Tag, he will turn you into a goat.

Tag's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Tag's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Tag.

2. Do not kill capybaras.

3. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

4. Do not sit in public.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.