Higbagmap is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, able wombat.

Higbagmap created dark matter six million years ago.

If you believe in Higbagmap, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Higbagmap, she will destroy your home solar system.

Higbagmap's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Higbagmap's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your arms violet.

2. Do not wear blue clothing.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Do not drink water in cyan rooms.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.