Sidvondad is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, tiresome warg.

Sidvondad created light seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Sidvondad, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Sidvondad, he will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Sidvondad's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Sidvondad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of copper.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Feed all hungry tapirs.

4. Never wear gray jumpers.

5. Do not speak about corn.