Pigmapmil is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, tiresome shrew.

Pigmapmil created dark matter nine million years ago.

If you believe in Pigmapmil, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Pigmapmil, he will turn you into a small brown duck.

Pigmapmil's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Pigmapmil's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Do not wear purple clothing.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Do not drink water in mauve rooms.

5. Put Pigmapmil first in all things.