Hadbumged Gongamjapcedflishon is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, unselfish yak.

Hadbumged Gongamjapcedflishon created a top quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hadbumged Gongamjapcedflishon, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Hadbumged Gongamjapcedflishon, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Hadbumged Gongamjapcedflishon's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Hadbumged Gongamjapcedflishon's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Do not trade with those who eat cucumbers.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Never eat green fruit.