Pidtigmap is a god.

He takes the form of a large, irritating centaur.

Pidtigmap created humankind three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pidtigmap, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Pidtigmap, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Pidtigmap's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Pidtigmap's Holy Commandments

1. Pidtigmap must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Do not drink water in fawn rooms.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

5. Respect your elders.