Quartcidbell is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, witty parrot.

Quartcidbell created Africa two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Quartcidbell, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Quartcidbell, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Quartcidbell's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Quartcidbell's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair white.

2. Do not kill mice.

3. Quartcidbell loves squirrels, so they must be respected.

4. Always help moths in need.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.