Fitnanril is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, blissful horse.

Fitnanril created viruses two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fitnanril, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Fitnanril, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Fitnanril's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Fitnanril's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Fitnanril's name in vain.

2. Fitnanril must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.