Femarmwon is a god.

He takes the form of a large, benevolent cat.

Femarmwon created a bottom quark two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Femarmwon, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Femarmwon, he will not care.

Femarmwon's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Femarmwon's Holy Commandments

1. Seals are not to be trusted.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Always obey Femarmwon's priests.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.

5. Never skip near tortoises.