Natnuthen is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, stupid crow.

Natnuthen created a Higgs boson four billion years ago.

If you believe in Natnuthen, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Natnuthen, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Natnuthen's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Natnuthen's Holy Commandments

1. Erect eight tin sculptures of Natnuthen on top of important buildings.

2. Hide from brown sheep for they are unholy.

3. Always treat foxes with great respect.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Put Natnuthen first in all things.