Lapgatmig is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, generous parrot.

Lapgatmig created the Sol system two billion years ago.

If you believe in Lapgatmig, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Lapgatmig, it will strike you with lightening.

Lapgatmig's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Lapgatmig's Holy Commandments

1. Put Lapgatmig first in all things.

2. You must pray to Lapgatmig six times a day.

3. Grasshopers are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Worship no other gods but Lapgatmig.